Tell Me ’bout The Good Ol’ Days

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Due to the nature of my work, I am able to take my grandfather on his weekly grocery shopping spree ( we have to hit several different stores each time for the lowest prices) as well as to his many doctor appointments. The man is 92. Believe me, he has many doctor appointments!

Two weeks ago I took him for a follow-up visit to his Primary Care Physician. Within the past 6 months he has taken to using a walker whenever we go out. And just two weeks ago he was prescribed oxygen due to difficulty with breathing. Thursday, February 6, we arrived at his doctor’s office at 9:30. am. By 9:45 he was called inside. By 9:50, I was called to join him. The doctor said there was signs of congestive heart failure and I had to get him to the E.R. right away.

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It is now 10 days later. He was admitted into the hospital that night. A tube was inserted into his lungs to drain the liquid and it still remains. He is bed-ridden now, not able to walk or even sit up for the past week. He has lost his appetite, has a cough and is depressed and non-communicative. They have prescribed Zoloft for the depression and decided to take a bone marrow test when they found a low platelet count to see if he has cancer. That was February 8 and they still do not have the results back. They just decided this weekend to test for tuberculosis as the cause of the fluid in his lungs and have put him in isolation just in case. The last time I was informed of his blood pressure, it was 93 over 44.

I fear the doctors are killing him.

 

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68 thoughts on “Tell Me ’bout The Good Ol’ Days

  1. Oh dear. I know what you mean. My mum is 82 now. Three years ago she had a really bad spell. An infection led to failure of just about everything – fluid on lungs, suspected liver and kidney disease, critically high blood sugar and failing heart, bed ridden in hospital. But she’s a tough cookie and she managed to fight back. She’s living on her own at home again now, cooking, cleaning and just a little unsteady on her feet. So don’t give up hope yet. If he can get over the depression maybe he can fight the doctors! Thinking of you!

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    1. Thanks, Debbie. I’ll be going back over to the hospital for a visit in a few minutes. I’m hoping he’ll be able to continue living alone as he wants and can avoid any kind of assisted living or nursing home until he passes quietly. At home.

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  2. My heart is hurting for you Emilio.

    My opinion – he doesn’t need Zoloft and I hate how quickly doctors want to respond to any situation with a drug. Of course your grandfather is depressed. He wants to go home … not lay in a hospital bed 😦

    Liked by 2 people

  3. It makes you wonder. Getting results from cancer tests can take a really long time. Back in 2010, I went to the Dr. with abdominal pain on May 5 2010, an ultrasound from that day showed I had lots of tumors. I started chemo on July 10, 2010 after 3 lymph node biopsies and a bone marrow biopsy. I can certainly understand why your grandfather is depressed.

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      1. I’m doing well. The fluid in his lungs probably has a lot to do with having him laying in a bed in a hospital.

        A few months after I finished treatments, my immune system was still having trouble recovering. I had a slight fever one day and went into the Cancer Center. After testing my immune system and seeing it was as zero as zero could be, they freaked out. One Dr. wanted to admit me into the hospital for the antibiotic infusions. I said “no way am I going anywhere near a hospital without an immune system!” She argued with me, and I finally told her to go see what my oncologist has to say. She came back with her tail between her legs and sheepishly said I was right. Basically my oncologist said “What the Hell are you trying to do? Kill him?” After a week of daily neupogen injections and antibiotic infusions, I finally got my immune system back.

        My doctor told me that with literally no immune system, the slightest infection would have killed me in a matter of hours. That’s why everyone was freaking out. Immune systems take a hit, but generally don’t get totally wiped out so long after being done with treatments.

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  4. Your poor grandfather . . . .gosh, he is going through so much while they for the cause without much, if any, consideration of the effects and overall comfort. Do hope he is feeling much better soon and best wishes to you all.

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    1. Thanks, Patti. There has been a terrible lack of communication between the hospital staff and me since this all began. Could they be embarrassed that they can not find out what is wrong with him? The bone marrow came back negative for cancer and they have one more test to rule out tuberculosis.

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  5. Emilio I am so sorry to hear of your Grandfather’s hospitalization. No matter how old those we love are the prospect of losing them is heartbreaking. I am sending positive energy to you both and will be thinking of you in the days ahead.

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      1. Emilio that is completely understandable. You obviously have a very close bond with your Grandfather. I in no way mean to be intrusive. As a nurse I have coached many family members to be honest with their loved one about how sad they are and how much they care. It often allows the patient to feel more open to share their thoughts too.
        Sending big hugs and lots of positive energy. Wishing peace and comfort for you and your Grandfather.

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  6. Emilio I am sorry to hear that your grandfather is going through this difficult time. I keep thinking of your previous post describing the frozen dinners and pizza he eats. Hopefully he will respond to treatment and he can go home again. 92 years old is a great life and God bless him. Thanks for being a good grandson to him you can be sure he appreciates it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Joe. It’s difficult to know what he appreciates as he is a man of few words. Have you met any Italians like that? Or are they all boisterous? Because he does not talk much, my father does not, either. And believe it or not, in social situations, I am just as awkward!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. My grandfather was also a man of few words Emilio. My father passed away at age 55 so I really didn’t have much time with him as an adult, that was 1975. I’m exactly the opposite in social situations, my wife always kids me that I can talk to a tree 😃

        Liked by 1 person

  7. I’m so sorry you’re going through this, Emilio. It does seem like the he’s on the treatment-go-round – getting treated for side-effects of the initial treatment. I think this is why one of my grandmothers had specific requests for her healthcare… her death would’ve been prolonged had she not communicated her wishes (and everyone feared her if they went against them and she lived, haha.) I do hope you are able to be some comfort to him.

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    1. I know I said I was only going to ‘like’ but this is not something I like. I have been going through exactly the same thing this whole past year with my 92 year old mom. It frustrating. It’s annoying. It’s necessary. It’s sad. And it breeds helplessness. For them and for us. Good luck, from the heart. I hope your grand dad improves.

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      1. 92 is an amazing age. I’m happy he’s been able to do whatever he wants till now. I’m afraid if he has to go into a nursing home the end would be that much faster. He has always been very independent. He won’t even consider living with us!

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        1. Really difficult decision for all concerned. My mom has been in a nursing home since August. She lived alone til then. I visit 6 days a week and have been since August. Sometimes I feel like I’ll go crazy and then I think – how must SHE feel?
          I’m SURE that you are a comfort. I know, since there is no one but me nearby, she lives for my visits. Go figure. 😉

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    1. He’s been in and out of the hospital so much in the past 5 years that they should know him by name! And yet this seems like the worst time. I see him deteriorating physically even though he is not in pain. Just unable to breathe deeply and now unable to walk or even sit up on his own.

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  8. Ah, Emilio, it just doesn’t seem right to hit “like” on this post. We all dread having our loved ones go through this. Your granddad is a lucky man to have you in his corner, advocating for him. Sending heartfelt wishes for strength, guidance, and comfort for you all.

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  9. Sorry to hear about your grandfather Emilio. My great grandmother lived to be in her mid 90’s and she lived in her own house and still drove herself to the store to buy things until the day she passed away. I guess the only thing you can do now is prepare for the worst but hope for the best. Always a difficult situation.

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    1. Thanks, Justin. It was relatively easy when he was still driving. But he stopped when he turned 90. Like your great grandmother, he lives alone and would have it no other way! That is what might make this next part more difficult, If they say he can’t.

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    1. Thanks, Laurie! I was there this morning when they finally pulled the tube out of his chest. Now supposedly there will be therapy to get him back on his feet then he has to be evaluated to see if he can be sent back home because he lives alone.

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  10. I’m so sorry to hear about your grandfather’s tough situation. So sad he needs to be in a hospital, it’s probably the last place he’d want to be. And you must feel awful seeing him depressed and feeling that whatever the doctors are doing is not helping. Sending lots of strength your way and hoping your grandfather feels better soon. You are a really great grandson!

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    1. He was released from the hospital after two weeks and straight into a rehab center- where he has refused to get out of bed- for almost another two weeks. Thank you for asking. We just don’t know what we can do.

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      1. Oh, I’m sorry. I think there is a time when just being there and caring is the most you can do. The rest, sometimes, has to come from them. Hopefully, he’ll find it in himself and come around for you again. Fingers crossed.

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"I take anything other than 'you big pig!' as a compliment." ~ Albert Brooks

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